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Wednesday, August 17, 2005

Gee, stress much?

Conquering the adoption paperchase, mounting pressure at work, an overbooked schedule, no exercise -- it's enough to stress anyone out, and I'm no exception. So I've been getting these headaches, and TubaDad finally threatened me into convinced me to go talk to a doctor about them. (Anyone who knows me will understand how shocking this is. People in my family only go to the doctor if actual bone is visible sticking out of the skin, or blood is gushing faster than it can be mopped up. Bobby, back me up here.) Anyhoooo, I sucked it up and went and talked to a nice doctor, and he checked me for malfunctioning whatevers, talked about how my stress levels are just not healthy (gee really?), then said "OK, if no one else has told you this before, you have migraines." What?!!!! I geared up for a massive protest, but then he started talking about the options and my eyes grew wide... You can take something to prevent headaches or take something to stop them once you get them. Well I instantly chose the lesser "stop them when you get them" option (because I am paranoid about pills) when he suddenly started describing the first preventative option. I can't remember the name of it, so I'll just call it "Lovely." Apparently Lovely is typically used as a mild anti-depressant but has the side effect of preventing headaches and relaxing tight muscles a smidge. Wait let me see if I have this right: so this option delivers "a touch of happy, a bit more relaxed muscles, and pain free" just in case I was, oh I don't know, stressed beyond belief with rockhard shoulder/neck muscles and blinded by headaches? I heard la La LA in my head and was nodding so fast I almost fell off the little doctor's bench. Stop right there, doc. No need to hear more. I'm sold. But then he detailed the second preventative option, I'll call it "Wonderful," which prevents headaches and causes weight loss. OH MY GOD. Am I dreaming? So this one promises "pain free and skinnier"??? HELLO, why haven't I ever heard about these things? And please help me out here and let me know how on earth, if I were to choose one (and I'm not saying that I'm going to choose one but it's fun to dream), would a stress puppy like me decide between Lovely and Wonderful? WHICH ONE WOULD WIN?!